SURRENDERING

 FOUL

FOR AN EARLY

 THANKSGIVING

FOUL FOR FOWL

   Last night was my weekly support group for families dealing with addiction.  The purpose of our group; support and encourage one another, learn about the disease and how to enable in healthy ways and how to take care of ourselves.  You see it is a disease that destroys the whole family not just the one suffering. So there is a great need for us to come together

   The room is small; it seats about 25 to 30.  I want to tell you every chair was filled.  Part of me feels saddened that we have this many people, on the other hand thankfully we have this many in out group.  I know there are so many more out there suffering and don’t know about support groups.

   I look around this room filled with people I now call friends.  Some of us have been attending this group for five or more years. That would be me.  Five years ago when I started attending we went around the room and introduced ourselves and who we were concerned about.  I remember hearing some say they had been coming to the group for over five years and that angered me.  Never would that be me!  My daughter would recover and live a healthy life. 

   Last night we our typical introductions; who we are, who we are concerned for, and what do we hope to get out of tonight.  I listened and hurt from the families. Stories of relapse, jail loved ones, death and fear of death.  Not knowing where your loved one is and if you will finally get the dreaded call from the morgue in the middle of the night   Tears, fear and anger shared.  Even laughter has happened in the middle of pain.  We have become bonded.  

   Yes, five years later I still sit there with many others. I myself am taken off guard that I still sit here, still feel such pain, frustration, anger and inadequacy to fix the problem and save my loved one. Angered we can’t control them or this disease. Learning I can't control or fix.  We are hurt in our very gut, and find it is difficult to breath.

  Almost everyone talked about the holidays approaching and our lives are certainly not like the Norman Rockwell picture.  There is no picture I could paint that you would give you a visual understanding unless you lived this FOUL NIGHTMARE. But it is not a nightmare; it is real life for us. FOUL; Filthy, entangled, detestable, disagreeable, stormy, treacherous, unfair, abusive and offensive, repulsive, obnoxious, horrible and hateful disease that robs families and lives of their health, joy, peace and hope.

   How to do we have hope and Thanksgiving?  Once again I have no other option than to believe and confess the Serenity Prayer;

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I can not change; the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference.

Once again I am left to surrender the pain of this FOUL disease and all that it brings at my SOVEREIGN SAVIORS feet.  What other alternative do I have but to lean on HIM and confess what HE has promised?

God is our merciful Father and the source of all comfort. He comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort others. When they are troubled, we will be able to give them the same comfort God has given us.

1 Cor. 1:3-4

God is our refuge and strength, always ready to help in times of trouble.

Psalm 46:1

For God has said, “I will never fail you.  I will never abandon you.”  So we can say with confidence, “The Lord is my helper, so I will have no fear.”

Hebrews 13:5-6

   I left the meeting with THANKSGIVING IN MY HEART.  I still had no idea how I would spend the actual non Norman Rockwell day.  However, in my heart I held much to be thankful. 

I am Thankful for my FAITH   Some may say as taught by twelve step programs, “their higher power”…I boldly say my higher power is JESUS CHRIST. Without HIM I would lack hope.

I am Thankful for this GROUP.  I express my great gratitude to leaders and friends that walk this road with me and bear one another’s burdens. We can not and should not ever try to do this alone.  God created us for fellowship with others and to bear another burdens.  WE NEED EACH OTHER.

Thanksgiving came early; it came in a little room in a house filled with hurting people in need.  Thankful for another day, Thankful we still breath, Thankful there is always hope, Thankful we are not alone.

  

Ingratitude, One of the Greatest Sins

"The Prophet Joseph said at one time that one of the greatest sins of which the Latter-day Saints would be guilty is the sin of ingratitude. I presume most of us have not thought of that as a great sin. There is a great tendency for us in our prayers and in our pleadings with the Lord to ask for additional blessings. But sometimes I feel we need to devote more of our prayers to expressions of gratitude and thanksgiving for blessings already received. We enjoy so much.                                                          

Ezra Taft Benson, quoted in Henry B. Eyring,     

HAPPY THANKSGIVING!

  I GIVE THANKS FOR MUCH..

AND SURRENDER THE FOUL!